Let them know, and let it go.
Let them know and then let it go. This is one of my favorite topics!
Let them know.
We all need to speak our truth. This simply means that no one can read our minds. It doesn’t matter if you have been married for 50 years, or dated someone for 10 months. You have to assume that the other party has no clue as to how you feel, what you need, or what you want. It is your responsibility to let them know!!
Let it go.
A huge issue that comes up when we choose to speak our truth is not believing the answer we get back.
“Are you mad at me?”
“No, I just don’t feel good today.”
“Yeah right, you ARE mad at me.”
“No, I’m not.”
This is a no win situation. We have no choice but to believe what the other person tells us. We ask the question, that raises the issue, and gives the person a chance to discuss it. If they choose to say there is nothing wrong, at least they know we feel something different coming from them.
When we are communicating with another person it is not our job to determine how they are going to respond to us. Think about it like a tennis match – you don’t serve the ball to the other court and then run over there to return the shot the way you want it returned. You need to deal with what is returned to you.
“You told me no. I’m letting it go. I’m choosing to believe you. So if that’s not the case, I guess you’ll tell me about that later.”
Let them know, and then let it go.